How do you RESPOND to NEGATIVE energy from other people?

“How do you RESPOND to NEGATIVE energy from other people?” Sue

This question came in from a Success 2.0 webcast.

Sue, One of the things I have learned from Dad is that most people are struggling, most people are hurting, and most of the time when you are treated rudely or abruptly it has very little to do with you.  Because of this core belief, when a negative encounter does happen, it doesn’t personally offend me because I don’t believe it has anything to do with me.  Instead I try to understand what is going on with the other person and I try to make sure my response is calming and not escalating.

However, sometimes you do get negative feedback that is directed at you.  Once again, it is good to understand that the tone and passion of the comment directed towards you has more to do with the other person’s issues than their issue with you.  A good example of this (although an extreme one) is road rage.  People who “lose it” already have a problem; the incident is just what set it off.  When you get jumped on by someone, keep in mind that they likely have a problem that has nothing to do with you.  Now you have a choice, you can react and make their problem your problem as well, or you can respond, and focus on the facts of the comments and work to a resolution without adopting their problem.

Dad sums it up nicely – “No one can make you feel inferior without your permission.”  Responding to the negatives in life is a choice. I encourage you to role play in your mind how you will handle these encounters so that your automatic response takes the encounters in the right direction.

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8 Comments on “How do you RESPOND to NEGATIVE energy from other people?”

  1. Gerry Riskin Says:

    Tom, thanks for carrying on your dad’s great work… This is excellent advice that applies inside law firms as well as other organizations I’m sure. Your advice to role play is critical – even more powerful if done with friend or colleague if possible. Keep up the great work.


  2. Social comments and analytics for this post…

    This post was mentioned on Twitter by tomziglar: New Ziglar Blog post – How do you respond to NEGATIVE energy from other people? http://budurl.com/p5ut

  3. anita Says:

    What a great question. When I am working hard to try and stay positive, negativity from others can sometimes be very difficult to overcome. Your point that when we choose to react we make their problems ours really spoke to me in a new way. I really don’t need to be taking on new problems! Thanks for your answer and for giving me new insight into responding vs. reacting.


  4. […] This post was mentioned on Twitter by Stacy Rea Thomas, Stan Dunster. Stan Dunster said: RT @TomZiglar How do you RESPOND to NEGATIVE energy from other people?: “How do you RESPOND to NEG.. http://bit.ly/5gnfiS […]

  5. Evan Tardy Says:

    Thanks for the encouragement!

  6. clintonskakun Says:

    HEHE! This rings a bell. I was listening to your Dad’s seminar where he was talking about the “cat kicking” society we live in. It’s so true.


  7. […] How do you RESPOND to NEGATIVE energy from other people? […]

    • Hlgpower4 Says:

      Actually I am glad this question came up because I was surfing the web trying to find an answer. I dont respond well to negative energy from people. I take it personal. Then it turns into anger and I want to react to it. Can you help??????????


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